Gut-Check Chertoff and the Mississippi Dem

From the great mind that brought you 10 False Flags that Changed the World, a scathing analysis of "Gut-Check Chertoff" and his psychic tummy. -r.

Gut-Check Chertoff and the Mississippi Dem

Almost every American knows that Thomas Jefferson was the principal author of the Declaration of Independence, which effectively gave birth to the United States of America.

But what Homeland Fascist was a principal author of the Patriot Act, which effectively polished off the Great Experiment in ordered liberty?

Correctamundo! It’s Gut-Check Chertoff.

Only 8 days after the September 11, 2001 attacks, Chertoff and Assistant Attorney General Viet D. Dinh had the 342-page Patriot Act written, printed, bound, and sitting on the desk of every member of Congress. From these facts alone, dear Watson, we can reasonably deduce several standard deductions, depending on your state’s tax code:

1. Michael Chertoff can sho’ nuff type fast.

2. There’s gotta be a 24-hour Kinko’s in the basement of the Capital.

3. If you mail the anthrax about two days before introducing your 342-page legislation with lots of boring stuff on pages 9-11, NOBODY’s gonna get to the part where you eradicate a nation’s cherished liberties, and NOBODY’s going to notice how much you plagiarized from the Reichstag Fire Decree.